Cats and Dogs

Why is it that women who live alone with 3 cats are considered to be loners who collect flowery things and know way too much about the history of Polka music? But woman who live alone with 3 dogs are considered to be athletic with short hair and shop at Eddie Bauer? A man who lives alone with 3 cats has mommy issues and has never had a girlfriend. A man who lives with 3 dogs probably has all his hair, but can stay in a romantic relationship for only 4 months. A woman who owns a snake also has many tattoos and piercings that get infected from time to time. She also has short black hair. A man who owns a snake probably never washes his jeans and talks too much. A woman who owns a rabbit or a hamster has been off Prozac for about a year and talks like a robot in their voice mail greeting. A man who owns a rabbit is probably a gourmet cook with anger issues. A man or a woman who owns more than 4 house animals has no sense of smell and not many friends. A man or a woman who owns a wild exotic animal will always be declined for a life insurance policy.
Anyone who owns a beta fish is lazy and probably lives in a deplorable living condition. If you own a horse, you are probably in the upper tax bracket.
These are my uneducated conclusions and if they bother you, then you need to lose your flowery trinket collection or clean your piercings with alcohol.